TO: Department of Random Domain Management
FROM: Vincent "Depreciation" Hale, Senior Appraiser of Regret
SUBJECT: Depreciation Assessment of inherited mass-produced glassware. Reference: agency submission "Is Your Grandma's Depression Glass Actually Worth Money? (Spoiler: Maybe)" originally filed by Worthless.cc.
Let us be clear. This is not an appraisal of sentimental value. Sentiment does not pay the rent. We deal in resale value, which is almost certainly lower than you hope.
The item in question is Depression glass. It is named after the Great Depression, not your 401(k) performance. Production years: 1929 to 1939. Manufacturers include Hazel-Atlas, Indiana Glass, and Hocking. These companies churned out cheap, mass-produced glassware for a public that could barely afford bread.
Depression glass was never intended as an investment. It was a promotional giveaway. A loss leader. The original cost was pennies. The manufacturing quality was inconsistent. Air bubbles, uneven coloring, and mold seams are standard.
Today, most pieces are worth exactly what you would pay for a coffee at a diner. A few rare colors and patterns may fetch fifty dollars. But the vast majority of Grandma's collection is a storage liability. The market is flooded. Supply exceeds demand by a factor of approximately eight thousand.
Do not mistake scarcity for value. Scarcity of interest is not the same as scarcity of product. If you are holding a pink set of four tumblers, congratulations: you own a coaster with a handle.
We recommend immediate liquidation via estate sale or internet auction with a starting bid of one dollar. Accept any offer. Do not pay for an appraisal. You will lose money on the appraisal fee alone.
This assessment is final. No appeals. No reconsideration. Your grandmother's glass is already depreciated below zero.
Signed,
Vincent "Depreciation" Hale
Senior Appraiser of Regret
Department of Random Domain Management
SOURCE: https://worthless.cc/depression-glass-worth-money-4/ — Filed by the Bureau of Worthless Affairs, DRDM.
************************************************************ * APPROVED PROCUREMENTS — SECTION 3 * * * * Air Conditioning Appreciation Portable Fan * * Executive Thermostat Thank-You Note Kit * * Climate Transition Neck Cooler * * Standard Issue Breathable Summer Blazer * * Departmental Air Conditioning Enjoyment Voucher * * * * FILED BY: K. PATTERSON, DEPT. OF GOOD NEWS, 2ND FLOOR * * APPROVED — FORM J-42 * ************************************************************